Monday, 16 April 2012

sexy back {16/04/2012}

last night, i set my alarm for 6am and set out my clothes. i had planned to get up before everyone else and go for a walk. but my alarm obviously hates me, because it didn't go off. nope, i DIDN'T do it wrong. NOPE. fuck off with that right now, it hates me. end. of. story. motherfucker.

anyway, all was not lost. i was so excited to start this new running program that i popped right up out of bed at 6:10am. not bad.
so i got my ass dressed, and slipped out of the house as quickly and quietly as i could. like a ninja. it was a beautiful spring morning, and i had my mp3 player blasting me into wakefulness with some metal. 

before i get into this any farther, i suppose i ought to explain why i was walking, if this is after all, a new *running* program. well, i am starting from scratch, even if it means that my progress will be slowed down, because under no circumstances whatsoever do i want to re-injure my ankle. that was a really shitty, depressing 2 weeks, yo.

so this program (i got it from a book that BF ordered me from runner's world. it's called "run your butt off") is geared towards helping a moderately sedentary person build up from walking to being able to run for 30 minutes straight. and while i as tempted to just kind of skip the first few weeks and start the program with the amount of running that i left off with, i know that i can't do that. my ankle is just starting to feel completely normal again, and it still gets a little twingy and weak at night. so i had to start from scratch with the phase 1 workout from my book: walk for 30 minutes, 3-4 times a week for 1 week.

so i took my walk. i really had a hard time stopping myself from running, especially with the kick ass playlist i was jamming to. but i restrained myself and kept it at a brisk walk.  it was nice, and it made me realize how much i missed having this time to myself, before everyone else was awake and needed me to cook something, clean something, kiss something better...

another part of the program that i like is that the book has a little workbook section in the back where you can track your progress. so  before the boys got home from school, i packed up baby and walked down to the health center to get on the scale. i don't keep a scale in the house because of my history of anorexia. i know enough about fitness and nutrition now that i really doubt that i will slip into those old, destructive habits again, but having a scale in the house would STILL mess with my head. i'd drive myself totally batshit insane. no doubt about it.

ahh... you see that?^^^
i'm stalling. because i really don't want to tell you what i weigh. fuck. but i will, even if the only purpose it serves is for documentation. i also recorded my other measurements. fun stuff.

Height: 5'10" {hell yes, i'm a big bitch!}
Weight: 212.3lbs
Chest: 41.25"
Waist: 40.5"
Hips: 44.7"
Thighs: 24.5"

stupid numbers, huh? i'll just forget all this shit right now. the whole point of all that {well the height/weight} was to calculate my BMR {basal metabolic rate, i.e. the calories my body needs daily for basic functions to keep my ass alive}. my BMR is currently 1782.

now i ain't about to go batshit insane and go counting my calories, but this book has some pretty cool formulas. for example, i used my BMR to calculate how many calories i need to maintain my current weight {not lose, not gain, just stay the same}. that number is 2450.25 calories. and that's not even taking into account any exercise. that's just if i did nothing but veg all day, i could remain at this weight as long as i didn't consume more than that. nifty, huh? 

anyway... enough of that. boring ass math bullshit, if i do say so myself. i had planned on doing my oxygen circuit sometime today. but then my little brother showed up and had the grand idea of taking the kids for a walk to the store. GRAND idea!! and of course, once they heard the word "store", they HAD.TO.GO.

the whole ordeal of getting them there, keeping baby from destroying the quaint little local business, and convincing them all to share a bag of chips was exhausting, to say the least. by the time we got back home, i had been on my feet for at least 2 hours. i was excited to see that BF was finally home, putting away groceries and cleaning up, and i planned to plop my ass on the front step, stick my toes in the sand, and watch him chase them around. but no. he was "busy cleaning the house." WTF? SERIOUSLY? motherfuckers heard it HERE first: the end times are upon us!! 

it was a beautiful day, and there were kids out playing all over the neighbourhood. but thanks to my exhausted ass, i could only take another hour and a half of lovely outdoors shenanigans like chasing baby as she tried to run headlong into traffic while dodging footballs, soccer balls, and the neighbour's psychotic, bike driving tikes. after that blessed hour and a half, i had to put on my "bad mommy" hat and say, "THAT'S ENOUGH!!" i brought the rugrats indoors, popped in a movie and put my damn feet up. 

so obviously, i am WAY too fucking tired for anything more strenuous than a hot bath with mr. stephen king and "the stand". up and at it again early tomorrow morning!!



  1. I love you. I need to get that book, my lazy, out of shape ass can't hoof it up a flight of stairs without feeling like I'm going to die.

    Btw, The Stand is one of my favorite books EVAH.

    1. thanks baby ;)
      would be nice to get back to reading the stand again. pity these young uns have to eat and stuff LOL